A Thousandth Of A Second
by Bubbly88Tay
Summary: Sometimes quick just isn't quick enough. Sometimes you learn that the hard way. Sometimes, just sometimes, you wish it was you that was needing to be held together, so that you wouldn't be falling apart now. (A alternative ending/beginning to season 2, episode 2&3, back to the Jay with a bounty over his head.)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N 1: Hey there everybody. I know it's been a while since I have done** ** _anything_** **on this website, and trust me, I'm extremely sorry. My biggest problem has just been that life has gotten in the way. My job has been keeping me there as often as possible, and honestly, I'm not complaining. I hate being home because half of my family hates me being home, and I would rather be somewhere where I can constantly be busy, and what better place to be busy, than at Disney World.**

 **So that's a big reason why I have been no where to be found the last couple of months. However, just because I haven't been posting, doesn't mean I haven't been writing. Trust me, there has been a lot of writing and brain storming this summer. I have so many ideas, and sometimes it's just so hard for me to put the pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard and just type it up.**

 **This is a three shot that I am almost done with that I have been wanting to write for about a year now. This is a alternative ending to an episode that I know could have gone a differnet way, and honestly, if I had my way (which is a good thing for Jay) this is the way the episode would have gone. Oh well. Better late than never.**

 **So this is continuing off from season 2 episode 2, Get My Cigarettes. I don't think much more needs to be said, because we all know where this is going.**

 **In other words, enjoy!**

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Just because she shoved him out of the way, doesn't mean she shoved fast enough. A bullet or two was still a bullet or two no matter how fast she was. Back in the academy, she was trained the smaller the caliber and sometimes, the smaller the gun, the slower the bullet would travel. The gun that was shooting at them right now was obviously a small caliber weapon, however, small caliber guns still go over a thousand feet a second. The distance between herself and the gun was far less than that. More like twenty feet.

Twenty feet between herself and the shooter.

Nineteen between her partner and the shooter.

Less than a thousandth of a second to make her move.

The only advantage she had on her side was the fact that she saw him before he saw them. Before he saw him to be precise. She had recognized the sketchy behavior long before he locked eyes on his target, her partner's, head. She knew what was coming almost immediately after she told him that they'd work something out.

That he would be a perfect gentleman, like 'usual.'

She heard the door squeak as the man swung it open and sat in the doorway to the bar for a second, and she heard herself practically screaming out Jay's name as the lanky man pulled something out from behind him.

And then it was chaos.

She wasn't sure how she managed to knock them both out of their stools, and still avoid hitting any tables, but she did and they both fell to the floor, Jay rolling to his side while she was almost immediately propped up on one knee, shooting back.

Glass was shattering in all directions, as was a window as bullets flew everywhere. Patrons of the bar screaming as the shooter suddenly began to flee. She knew she had to have hit him as she shot up after him, glancing quickly at her partner out of the corner of her eyes as he lethargically rolled onto his back and began the climb to his feet.

She didn't pay it much attention as she should have, maybe he had hit his head on the floor or something. While she had a small margin of time to figure out her landing, she literally just threw him to the ground. The bartender, Maddie, was climbing to her feet behind the bar, visibly shaking as she clutched the bar for support.

Once again, Erin didn't pay much attention as she ran after the man, through the doorway, which was covered in glass, and outside into the cooling Chicago night time air. The vehicle the man had obviously gotten into and was getting away with was skidding all over the road as Erin shot at it, but all for naught. The vehicle kept on driving and the gunman effectively got away.

She brought out her phone, and began to place the call in as she examined her surroundings as she stepped back into the doorframe. Her lips stopped moving, air ceasing to flow from them when she heard the scream. The scream carrying her partner's name.

She back to the back of the bar, where she had just left her partner, her phone forgotten as she looked around, spotting Maddie as she stood where she was before, this time, her hands covering her mouth as she stared with her mouth agape at the floor. Quickly noticing that she couldn't see her partner, Erin rushed to where she had left him, and regretted she had.

He was back on his side, unmoving and pale, his face pointing away from her as his chest heaved against the ground. There was a small puddle of blood underneath him that was slowly growing and spreading.

And that was when she realized that she had been too late.

She could see the holes through his shirt that led to into the soft flesh of his back marking where the bullets had traveled and buried themselves into the fragile flesh of Jay's body. The first bullet hole was on the upper left side of Jay's back. The second hole, rested in a spot that could possibly end Jay's life as he knew it. It was in the middle of his back, right above his spine.

Jay was shaking, and his teeth were clenched tight as he tried to control his breathing to no avail. His breaths were coming in short, clipped inhales and exhales as his body shook from the shock and the pain of being shot. She didn't want to touch him, but he was really bleeding, and once again she was forced to make a split second decision.

"Jay, it's going to be OK. Alright. Just hang in there." Erin reassured, grabbing his shoulder carefully and rubbing it with her left hand as she continued to search for any other wounds that she might have missed.

He nodded slightly. "B'ck." He choked, the air catching in his throat.

"I know. I see. It doesn't look good but you gotta hang in there, OK?" Erin asked, quickly and carefully placing a firm hand over the wound over his left side, holding the blood in. She wasn't a doctor, however, she did know that any unplanned, unnecessary holes in the body were almost always bad.

She whipped her head in Maddie's direction. "Maddie, I need towels, anything to staunch the bleeding." The woman was clearly in shock, but so was the man bleeding out under her fingertips and right now, he was more of a priority. The woman continued to stare at Jay's shaking body before Erin snapped her head and most of her upper body around. "God damn it, I need something to keep the blood in his body. Can you get me something? Please? Now!"

Maddie reacted immediately this time, turning quickly and running to the back of the bar as Erin turned back to Jay. "Alright. You're going to be okay, helps on the way, and you're going to be fine."

"Right." He didn't say any more after that, as he stared at the wall, chomping down on his jaw to stop his teeth from chattering. Maddie fell to her knees on the other side of Jay handing Erin the towels. She dropped her hands in her lap as she stared at Jay's ghostly face Erin pressing one towel into the one wound, still unsure what to do about the other.

"Maddie. Hold his hand, grip it tight and make sure he stays awake. Jay, If you fall asleep, I'll be forced to do something that could very well paralyze you for the rest of your life. So try not to fall asleep." Erin ordered as she carefully laid the second towel over the second hole.

"Might as well, can't feel my legs anyways." Jay whispered right before he let out a light groan, his eyes shuttering closed for a second before Maddie placed a gentle hand on his cheek. "Next few rounds are on us if you make it through this. You hear me?"

Jay's eyes fluttered back open and he smirked at the offer as Erin hovered a shaky hand over the towel, then carefully began to place pressure on the wound. Jay cried out at the new pressure, but Erin could still feel the blood pulsing out of the wound. "Damn it."

They sat like that for a few seconds before Erin heard the enclosing sirens. "Fantastic. You hear that Jay."

His half lidded eyes looked up at her with a mischievous look. "Yea."

"Good."

Erin continued to place pressure on the wounds as the paramedics ran into the bar minutes later as Jay continued to strain and try to look up at Erin, memorizing her face like he had been for the last year, knowing that he would be fine if this was the last face he saw. Sure there were tears leaking out of her eyes that she was probably unaware of, and then there was the grim look on her face as her lower lip was sucked into her mouth, probably the only thing that was helping her keep her composure, but her beautiful face was still as gorgeous as ever.

Minutes felt like hours and somewhere in that time he drifted. He wasn't sure if he actually passed out, or if he was just drifting where pain wasn't such an issue, but the point of the matter was that yes, he wasn't paying attention. Or he wasn't up until the point where his chest felt like it was on fire and everything below that was completely numb. He wasn't even sure if he had anything below his ribs.

He heard people talking to him, and he felt hands, hands holding his blood in his body, hands holding his hands, hands slapping his cheeks, and he could definitely smell alcohol, but it was like everything was trying to grab his attention at once, and then, nothing was grabbing his attention at all.

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 **A/N 2: Hopefully by posting this now, I will get some spurts of motivation to continue. Like I said, this will only be three chapters, and it's going to be a relatively cut and dry story unlike some other ones that I have in the works.**

 **I really hope you all like it, and I can't wait to hear what you all think! Reviews of any sort are more than welcome, as are PM's because I love hearing from all of you.**

 **Love you all!**

 **Tayler**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hello again! I'm impressed, an update to a story and it hasn't taken me many months. Woohoo! So, just a quick note, Will and Mouse are not yet part of the story line as they didn't really come into play until the second half of the season. And yes, I know that the events in this chapter are unrealistic, however, in all honesty, a lot of this was just me trying to get back into writing. So, it will remain only a three chapter story. For those of you who wanted to see this expanded, that would take a lot of time and dedication, of which I don't really have much of. Which is unfortunate, however, if someone ever wanted to expand upon and I felt you could do it with grace and dignity, than I would be all for it, but a disability, permanent or not, is a disability and deserves a level of respect that I am just not sure that I could handle.**

 **Anyways, y'all are probably tired of seeing me writing, so on to the story.**

 **Disclaimer - every last mistake is mine. Sure I have someone read this before I post for the most part, but that's just to tell me whether it's complete shit or not. So, yes, thank you Jay, we missed you Belle, and I still don't own Chicago or any of its shows affiliated with it. Whoops.**

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Erin was well aware, as she stared into the bathroom sink in front of her, that she was shaking. That if it weren't for the fact that she was too busy scrubbing the soap into suds that she continued to rub up and down her arms, she would probably be holding on to the counter. She knew that if she let herself think of anything, besides washing off the blood that coated her hands, than she would start falling apart.

It wouldn't be a little bit either.

It wouldn't be much, but it wouldn't be a little bit.

She kept scrubbing, until the water stopped being pink and continued to just be water with suds. Flowing from her hands and into the bowl of the sink. Every so often, the water would splash a little bit and jump onto the edges of the sink, and sometimes, the water would bounce onto her shirt, but Erin didn't notice. All she could do was concentrate on removing the blood that was staining her hands that her brain had yet to register was long gone.

She didn't pay mind to the people, women, that would flow into the public restroom, do their business and then come out to wash their hands right besides her. Washing their hands, staring at her for a few moments before they remembered where they were, at a hospital, and get on with their lives. Leaving Erin, to continue to scrub her hands on her own.

It wasn't until someone had placed a hand on her shoulders, and then turned the water off before Erin looked up from her rubbed raw fingertips, and to the reflection in the mirror. Her reflection.

What stared back, didn't seem like it was Erin Lindsay. It was a girl. A girl who was afraid, and had just had her best friend ripped away from her, and all she wanted to do was cry. All she wanted to do, now that she had made the connection, was to slide to the floor, and curl up into a little ball, and sob.

Because last night was hard.

So Erin did her best to grip the countertop and stare back at the reflections. Her own and the woman who gently held her shoulders and stared back through her reflection. "You've been in here over an hour. Do you want to come sit down and wait for news with me?"

Trudy Platt, the most underrated woman in the entire district, started to rub her thumbs into the back of Erin's shoulder, doing what little she felt that Erin needed in the moment. Erin shook her head, gently, as another strand of hair fell from behind Erin's ear and swayed in front of Erin's face.

"Hun. I think you need to at least sit down, I'm worried about you." Trudy suggested, smiling reassuringly down at Erin as Erin shook her head once again.

"I'm not the one you should be worried about."

Erin said the words with a sort of detachment that seemed to strike Trudy, as if she couldn't believe that someone, namely Erin, had told her that what she was doing wasn't correct. Trudy pursed her lips for a moment as Erin looked down again, letting go of the counter as she looked down at her hands, the tremor in them extremely noticeable.

"Erin, turn around and look at me." It was Erin's turn to be a little caught off by the words, and more so the tone, of Trudy's words as the bathroom seemed to grow smaller around the two women, as if the rest of the world didn't exist. Because right now, that's all it was. Trudy and Erin. And the toilet in the stall behind them.

She didn't move, so Trudy moved Erin. One moment Erin was staring downwards at her hands, and the next, Trudy had pushed her way between Erin and the sink, and had gently pushed her chin upwards, so she had no choice but to be looking up. Erin couldn't bring herself to look straight into the woman's eyes, and instead, let her gaze linger on the area besides Trudy's' left cheek.

"Erin. I'm not worried about Jay, because I know Jay. I know Jay almost as well as you know Jay." Erin pursed her lips, as tears began to sting at Erin's eyes, the mere mention of Jay's name enough to send her crying.

"And do you want to know what I know, and what you seem to have forgotten?" Trudy asked, tilting her head a little bit so that she could stare into Erin's eyes. The gesture was genuinely simple, yet so comforting. Erin instantly wanted to just crawl into Trudy's arms, and just to be held.

A tear must have slipped, out of her eye and down her cheek, leaving a sparkling trail down Erin's face, because one moment Trudy was holding her chin, and the next, she was holding Erin. Her arms wrapped around Erin's shoulders, and she allowed Erin's head to rest on her own shoulder.

Trudy had been in this situation before. She had seen far too many police officers, good people, shot and a lot of them had died. Far more than was appropriate to recall at that current second. But every single time, without fail, the people that most often needed the most help were family, followed extremely close by the partner of the victim.

And Erin was both.

Seeing as Jay didn't have any family, she figured that Erin was the one that needed the most help at that moment. That needed someone. While the rest of the Intelligence unit, as well as at least half of the precinct, including Roman and Burgess, were out searching for the men responsible, Erin was here on her own.

So Trudy made sure she wasn't alone.

They stood in silence for a few minutes, Trudy allowing the woman to cry and at one point, sob into her shoulder, and Trudy rubbed her hands in circles on the woman's back offering her comfort.

When one minute turned into two, and two into five, Erin finally began to pull away, rubbing at her tears, trying to remove any evidence of her letting go, but it didn't remove the red rimmed eyes that stared up at Trudy as she leaned back against the counter, her arms crossed across her chest.

Another few seconds passed before Trudy cleared her throat, speaking up. "He's one of the strongest detectives I have ever worked with. That's what you seem to be forgetting."

Erin smirked, nodding her head, not trusting herself to respond, she instead wiped her eyes again, then wiped her hands on her pants.

"He's strong, and I have no doubt that he's going to pull through this. Now what do you say we go sit down out in the waiting room? Or get some food? Whatever you want to do?" Platt extended an arm as Erin walked into it, allowing Trudy to lead her from the bathroom and out into the much lighter hallway of the hospital.

"Has there been any word?" Erin finally asked as they neared the waiting room. Trudy shook her head solemnly.

"Yea, he's still alive and the first part of the surgery was successful. They got the bullet out of his shoulder, stopped the bleeding there. Other than that, we know nothing." Trudy shrugged, doing her best not to show her struggling emotions. Her fear, and her hope, and her sadness…

Erin nodded, the information sinking in as she turned into the waiting room that was nearly empty besides a small cluster of people in the corner, gathered together in some sort of prayer. Not there for Jay, but someone else who's own life was on the verge of not being a life anymore.

Erin turned to the table that held freshly brewed coffee and some condiments. She grabbed a styrofoam cup and poured herself some and helped herself to a little sugar and milk while Trudy helped herself as well. Less than a minute later the two were resting comfortably in chairs as they watched the flow of people.

An hour passed, and in that time, the praying family got the news they wanted to hear, their son made it through the emergency appendectomy fine. Another two families came in, one family crying together in the corner that the praying family had just vacated, and the other walked nervously around the room.

Another hour passed, and in that hour, the nervous pacers lost a family member, and Erin found that pacing suited her better. Voight had called twice to check in, and Ruzek and Antonio had both called once to hear the story for themselves.

In the third hour, after countless menial conversations that fizzled out as quickly as they had started with Trudy and a member of the family in the corner, Erin finally heard the scuff of a pair sneakers making their way into the room, the feet dragging as if they had been standing for hours on end and they just wanted to sit down.

Erin looked up to the doctor in the dark, navy scrubs. The five o'clock, blonde shadow on his face matching the color of the locks that laid limply on his head. His blue eyes shone dully as he scanned the room. "Family of Jay Halstead?"

Erin raised a timid hand as she stared at the little blotches of blood on his scrubs.

The doctor smiled a reassuring smile and waved her over to a stretch of chairs nearest to the doors as he himself fell into one, letting his legs expand outwards until they were lying straight ahead of him. "You don't mind, do you? My feet are actually throbbing right now?" He smiled another light smile, which did a lot in terms of lifting Erin's spirits.

She shook her head as she cleared her throat, standing in front of him with Trudy at her back, not being able to bear the idea of sitting down at a moment like this. "So how is he?"

The doctor smiled again. "He's good. Better than expected actually." The doctor stopped, allowing Erin herself to smile at the news as Trudy rubbed her shoulder reassuringly. "Part of the reason why it took us so long was because of the bullet in his back. It fortunately only hit the muscles just to the left of the spine. The swelling is what was causing the issues with his the numbness in his legs. We were able to remove that bullet and the bullet from his shoulder successfully."

Erin felt her shoulders drop as she finally was able to take a breath without feeling sick to her stomach. "Jay woke up in recovery and we ran some tests then just to make sure, and he was definitely regaining the ability to move his feet and legs. Which leaves me little doubt that he's going to be ok. It's probably going to be painful, he'll be in a sling for at least two weeks to try and leave his shoulder stress free, and I'm assuming that he'll probably wear a brace for his back for a while, especially during strenuous activities to help the muscles heal, however, like I said. Im very optimistic that he's going to heal up just fine. Possibly be back to desk duty within a month and regular duty in three."

Erin reached forwards and hugged the doctor, albeit awkwardly in the position that they were in, but she was definitely more than grateful. So grateful that any words of thanks that she could come up with just weren't enough. Jay not only was going to make it, but he was going to be walking in no time.

She hadn't paralyzed him, she hadn't killed him. Overall, two things that she wasn't sure she would be able to say at the end of the day.

"Can I see him?"

The doctor smiled again. "I don't see why not, just, uh, give me a minute, feet are still throbbing."

Erin smiled gratefully still, "Absolutely. I need more coffee anyways."

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 **A/N 2: Well, I really hope you all enjoyed that, and if you did (or didn't) leave me a review. You guys are always amazing with the reviews, and I do read every single one, and with time, I respond to every PM I get, so if you all would rather just write and talk, than I am pretty much always for it. Just a matter of me having no time. (Partly of which is my fault, considering I took an eleven mile bike ride for no reason this afternoon... oh well.)**

 **I love y'all!**

 **Tayler**


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